Playing It Safe

04/24/2012

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I'm a little annoyed. With that annoyance comes a complete inability to express myself in a loving yet critical way. I don't want to be annoyed. I want to know that the constructive criticism I've given has been received well and built upon. But I don't know that. I might never know that. Which makes this annoyance sink deeper.

This week at Naked Truth the message was on singleness. Honestly, I dreaded it. I hate being singled out because I'm single... especially because I don't want to be single. I understand the church's desire to address the single community and I appreciate their enthusiasm in reaching all of their members. But to me, talking about singleness just makes it that much more unbearable. I don't need to be told by yet another person that God has a reason for my singleness, that He has a plan. I know all of this, believe me!

This was where my annoyance started and it continued to ebb and flow over the remainder of the evening and eventually leaked into my week.

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Sounding Off

04/05/2012

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This is me... I am a recovering sex and porn addict. Shocked? Yeah, me too. Shocked that this was ever something that I stumbled onto, shocked that I am in recovery, and shocked that I’m saying it here for the whole world to see. I thank the Lord every day that I am in recovery, but more so, that He has given me the boldness and the courage to say these words... I am a recovering sex and porn addict... and I’m a woman! Without boldness, this issue will never be addressed. Without boldness from other women, it would have taken me so much longer to be released from this bondage. This bondage that was horrifyingly excruciating and often times debilitating.

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An Apology

03/07/2012

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After publishing my post yesterday I felt a heavy weight on my shoulders and The Spirit kept nagging me about something. I couldn't figure out what it was and I wasn't willing to be still for long enough to actually discern what He was trying to communicate.

But this morning He was more forceful about it. I tried to be productive and to ignore Him for the time-being... putting it off til later. Until I was ready. Then it hit me:

“Lauren, you'll never be ready.”
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The things that threaten to come out of my mouth...

03/06/2012

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I can be really ghetto at times... I snap my fingers, I say “girl” a lot, I say “shoo” (as in “shoot” but really it's “shoo”), I “holla” at people, I dance around in my pjs to Montel Jordan, I raise the roof, and I even do a mean booty shake. I have attitude, sass, and lots of gumption when it comes to speaking my mind.

This quality doesn't get revealed with normal first-time introductions... you have to get down to the nitty gritty to see this side of me. Here's a tip, if you want to see this side of me right off the bat, do something to piss me off. (But really, please don't.)  

Because of this endearing quality (really, just ask my friends, it's endearing & hilarious) I have a tendency to say things with candor and without sugar coating it. I don't shy away from the tough topics, I don't tell you what you want to hear... I tell the TRUF! People tell me that this quality is valuable and refreshing. I really hope they aren't just placating my ego.
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